Wednesday, October 20, 2010

A Community Based on Trust.

Days since hubby deployed: 134

Days 'til he returns: currently unknown

Work In Progress: shelved for a bit, preparing for NaNoWriMo



As I write this, a sick, sick man is being tried for horrible, unthinkable crimes. Crimes committed here. Where I live, where I work. He was my husband's boss. In fact, he was the boss of thousands. And thousands more trusted him with their lives, their careers...their families. He abused that trust, using information he gathered through his power at work to stalk, steal, rape and murder. Where I live. Where I work. Where my children play. I thought he was a friend.

It's thrown me for a bit of a loop. You can't avoid the shocking testimony. It's on the cover of every local paper. On the television. On the internet. It's talked about in the grocery store. On Twitter. On Facebook. It's terrifying, sickening and it's very real, because it's right here. I keep my dog close. I triple check the doors and windows at night. Leave lights on outside. I hug my kids. I pray the time will go quickly and my husband will be home soon.

Miltary families are regularly thrown into situations where they have to trust complete strangers. We move. We rarely have extended family to depend on. Our spouses go away. Our commanders have access to information no civilian boss would. It is a system based on trust. Honor. Integrity. Respect. These are words that we live by. And this one man has threatened it all.

There are so many people I have had to trust in the past. Neighbours, babysitters, workmates, book club friends...people I've met through my husbands work, through military family resource centres, standing at kids' schools, waiting outside kids' activities. Some are miltary, some are civilian. My 'military family' includes people from across the globe. People I've had to depend upon. Wonderful, wonderful people that have listened to me when I needed a friend. Supported me. I am so thankful for each and every one of them. It's quite overwhelming to think of the wonderful friendships I've built over the years with people who started out as strangers. I hope I have been as valuable to them as they have been to me.

I debated a long time before discussing the fact that my husband was away on the internet. I didn't want to advertise the fact that he was away. Especially as his ex-boss was awaiting trial for preying on women who were home alone. But I want to share my experiences, maybe to help another deployed spouse, maybe to help others understand life in the military community.

I know this will pass. He'll be sentenced. The news will find something else new and shocking to cover. But my military family will endure. I won't stop trusting people just because of one man's hideous crimes. In fact, I will trust them more. Trust that we will keep each other safe.

Brenda

Sunday, October 10, 2010

A Vacation in the Clouds


Days since hubby deployed: 122 That's four full months.

On my reading list: Actually, I'm not reading anything right now. Just finished all of Cassandra Clare's Mortal Instruments, and Clockwork Angel

Eagerly Awaiting: Crescendo. What's going to happen with Patch and Nora??

Current Work In Progress: About 17,000 wds. Sadly, I've not been at my computer much.



I am a lucky lady.

Seriously. I just got back from the absolute BEST vacation ever. 14 days of perfection. Five nights in Tuscany, two nights in Venice and seven nights cruising the Greek Islands on the Norwegian Gem. Bliss. And the best part? I got to spend the whole time with my wonderful husband! Sure, crossing the Atlantic (sans help)with my three children was a bit daunting. And the preparations required for two weeks of travel with a diabetic daughter were a little more than average...but so worth it.

We got to climb to the top of the Tower of Pisa. We crossed the Ponte Vecchio in Florence. We went horseback riding and drank locally produced wine in Tuscany(me sitting at our Tuscan villa at left) . We took a gondola ride through the canals of Venice(photo at top right), and a donkey ride up the cliffs of Santorini. And we were spoiled rotten on a beautiful cruiseship in the Aegean.

Travelling with kids may not be for everyone, but those who have read through my Dunnesinuk posts know that we are HUGE fans of it. While sitting in our apartment in Venice we were reading The Thief Lord by Cornelia Funke to the kids- and realized we'd had lunch in the very Piazza that Prosper and Bo were in. So Cool. And then we revisited many of the same places Tom and I had visited on our honeymoon thirteen years before- the kids got to see it first hand.

Unfortunately, at the end of all of this bliss my husband had to board a plane going one way, and we had to board our squishy-tight and very delayed transatlantic flight going the other way. All good things must come to an end. I'm not complaining-just stating a fact. I am very blessed to have had the opportunity. My kids were OUTSTANDING travellers. Even the stewardess on the flight stopped to tell me how impressed she was with their manners and behaviour (shameless brag). I was very proud of them. And I actually returned feeling refreshed- both physically and emotionally. I loved just about every minute of our trip, but I'm glad to be home. In two and a half months we'll all be together again, and family life can restart. Well, that is until we get the posting message that's due...

Hope you all had a great Canadian Thanksgiving.

Brenda